There is a mental health awareness campaign happening. (There is always a mental health awareness campaign happening.) Did you know that it is Good To Talk? Have you heard about the Benefits of Exercise? Has anyone reminded you It’s OK To Not Be OK today?
What you want to do is scream and fling things around – maybe in Real Life, like smashing plates in your kitchen, or maybe On The Internet, using ALL CAPS to emphasize YOUR FEELINGS ABOUT THIS. You want to say, fuck off. Don’t you know, people, that listening and sympathy comes with an expiry date far sooner than anyone who needs comfort can cope with? How have you missed this?
That Talking to your friends, family, whoever about the monster you turn into is to reveal something so ugly and twisted that they will never look at you the same way again. It is a way to transform relationships to ashes. Sadness is boring, and anger is repulsive, bile at the back of your throat and stinging your nostrils, and no one wants to know, not really, because life is hard and shit happens and why has a hug and a shoulder to cry on not fixed you yet, you stupid ungrateful bitch?
Useless cunt. If you just went to the gym. If you just tried harder. If you just. But you won’t. Don’t you appreciate how lucky you are?
(Have you tried meditation? Or vitamins?)
Don’t scream. You can’t scream. ‘Cause then. Well, then, what you are, honey, is crazy in that unattractive way, and there’s no supportive hashtag for that yet.
Claire Hennessy (@chennessybooks) is a writer, editor, book reviewer & creative writing facilitator from Dublin, Ireland (www.clairehennessy.com).
Photo by Prateek Katyal.